Letter for my Babes

Dear Babes, 

I pray you always stay positive.  That you see the good in everyone.  That you CHOOSE to let light in your life and to rise above whatever sour lemons may be handed to you.  

"Heavenly Father is constantly raining blessings upon us. It is our fear and doubt that, like an umbrella, block these blessings from reaching us."

In this video, I think it's interesting how the woman at first recognizes those blessings falling.  She is happy and unaffected by the people around her.  Then she recognizes how people are looking at her.  She sees that she is different.  It seems to make her question the joy she is feeling.  She follows suit and opens her umbrella.  But then she sees a flower sprouting from the sewer.

She is reminded of the MANY blessings she has in her life.  She sees the good again.  Despite how the world perceives her.

This was my interpretation of this little Mormon Message today.  It was a much needed reminder. 

I hope that y'all will not be affected by those around you who may perceive your happiness as childish.  Those that think you do not understand the world and its heartache.  Those who might think you are too sheltered from the world.  That your happiness is over the top or immature.  Even naive.  

Don't you dare let the world taint your happiness.  Don't you let what others think make you feel silly for letting your light shine.

Shine bright my babes.  Be happy.  See the blessings that God is pouring down on you.  I know it's hard sometimes.  Really hard.  But the blessings are there.  I swear!!!

Be proud of who you are and dare to be different!

Love, Yo Momma

Source: Living the Gospel Joyful

"Gratefuls" and Affirmations

I have been keeping an ongoing journal of things I'm grateful for and positive affirmations.  I take a few minutes every day or every other day or once a week depending on my level of dedication haha to write down a page of "gratefuls" and affirmations.  Some from today's entry:

I'm grateful for my knowledge of a higher power.  That there is a God.

I'm grateful for music that inspires and uplifts.  Mat Kearney will always have my young heart.

I'm grateful for my lover boy who is enduring and enjoying life with me to the end.

I'm grateful for my health.  For my strong frame.  For a newfound attitude of finishing what I start. 

I'm grateful for Rigg's bucktooth grin and snuggly disposition that soothes my spirit.
He is my angel boy.  He is my constant reminder of what truly matters most.

I'm grateful for a social media community that shares goodness and inspires people to do and be their best.

{Riggs 12 months old}

I will remember this season of life is short.

I will let go of negativity and embrace hope.

I will nurture my faith and not my fears.

I will love without boundaries.

I will use my hands to serve.

I will unplug when with the people I love.

I will open and close each day with an honest conversation with God.

I will laugh hard and often.

Journaling these things as often as possible has brought light in my life.  It cures any bad mood.  It lifts my spirits when they need to be lifted.  Give it a try!

Riggs Recently {8 Month Edition}

You sweet, sweet thing you.  I was thinking about you a lot tonight baby boy.  How much of a joy you have been for your dad and I.  You were so meant to be in our family at this exact time, I can't even express it.  You are the perfect addition.  Your calm, sweet nature keeps us all level-headed and reminds us just how blessed we are when sometimes the chaos of life right now makes it easy to forget.  You smile like it's your job.  That smile engulfs the entire bottom half of your face.  It's hysterical!  We can't help but laugh and smile when you smile at us!  

You've been getting into everything lately.  You love anything electrical and off-limits.  You pull yourself up on just about anything.  You live on the outer rim of our living room right now, pulling yourself up on the TV stand, the chair, the couch, your sister's trampoline, the toy shelves.  You've gotten some bumps to the forehead, but you just keep goin' at it.  You fall, but keep getting up over and over again.  I feel like you'll always be this way.  I feel like you'll be my positive, happy boy who realizes that trip-ups are gonna happen, and that even when you fail, it's not the end of the world.  You'll know that all it means it that you put yourself out there.  It means you're trying and you're getting stronger.  Because everytime you pick yourself up you get stronger and wiser.  You learn more about yourself and you grow.  You are our little buddy.  I hope you always find a friend in your parents.  I hope you can always talk to me.  Sometimes you'll probably be embarrassed, nervous, or think I won't understand, but I hope you try anyways.  I will always love you and always listen to you. 

You are our sweet, angel boy.   Don't you ever forget how far sweetness will get you!  Sometimes you might feel like you have to prove something by being tough and hardcore, but in the end the kind ones are always the best guys.  You can be tough, but be sweet.  Be loving.  Be a good friend.  Be a good brother.  Love the people around you.  I have a feeling you'll be very personable and friendly.  People will be drawn to you because of your positive energy.  

I love you Riggs!

Dear Chillins

Dear Reese and Riggs, 

I don't have much to say today other than I really, really, really love you.  You make me such a proud momma!

♥, Momma

The Mask You Live In

I hesitated to post this because I feel like there's probably a lot of criticism about a video like this (and some language, sorry!!), but I felt like after working with young adolescent boys in a juvenile detention center, I saw this problem.  It was so real.  After getting to know the boys in my group at the detention center, I realized there was an emotional side to them that had been neglected.  They feared being made fun of by peers for having emotions other than frustration.  They always felt like they had something to prove.  I know each individual's particular story and circumstances are different, and there are contributing factors to each scenario, but I fear that there is too much emphasis on "being a MAN".  I think it's important for men just like women, to feel confident and empowered, but there are different ways for them to be empowered than telling them to "suck it up and be a MAN."  As if there if some expectation they need to live up to.  There is place though for being responsible for your actions, doing the best you can to take care of yourself and your family, and not backing down from hard things because it's the right thing to do (not for fear of being labeled a "wuss").

Having a son now, I feel like I thought about Riggs and how we'll teach him compassion, strength, and perseverance.  Without making him feel like he has some sort of wordly "manhood" to live up to.  When all is said and done, I don't want Riggs to be scared to be a good man.  To be a man that stands for what is right.  A man that cares for others without fear of being "soft".  A man that expresses how he's feeling through words instead of resorting to violence or bottling it up.  I hope I can teach him to have a drive to succeed honestly, responsibly, and for the right reasons.  Not to prove anything.  The best guy friends I have had (my husband the front-runner) in my life have not been afraid of their emotions.  They care deeply, talk about their experiences with others, and most importantly they aren't embarrassed or ashamed of who they are.  You can be a tough guy and a sweetheart.   

I want Riggs to be proud of who he is.  Whoever that may be.  I know he'll go through phases where it'll be hard not to care what people think of him, but I pray that over time he can learn to NOT care what others think of him but more importantly how he feels about himself.  

♥, Ashton

Dear Riggs {Blessing Day: November 22, 2015}

Your blessing day was one for the books Riggs.  We were surrounded by family and friends that we love so much.  I remember when we kind of started off the night and Buns welcomed everyone, I got all choked up feeling so grateful that Riggs will always have such a wonderful support system.  You have so many people that love you Riggs!  We started off the evening with your blessing, and finished with some good food and hanging out with family.  I kept thinking the whole night how grateful I was that you came into our little world.  It seemed so quick, only 18 months after your sister came into our world, but we couldn't imagine our life without you now.  

You are such a crucial member of little family Riggins.  Already you've had such an impact on your dad and I.  You and Reese have taught us both different things so far, and so far you have definitely taught us to smile more and worry less.  You have our heart baby boy.  Your daddy gave you a beautiful blessing.  He is such a good man Riggs.  I'm so excited for y'all to become closer and closer friends.  He will be one of your number one fans (me being the other one of course!).  When you're older, I hope you always feel you can confide in your parents, but especially your dad.  He will always listen and always love you no matter what.  We love you Big Rig!!!

Slobbery Perfection

Dear Riggs, 

Sometimes I like to just lay down next to you while you're on your back playing on the floors and snuggle you.  You've been doing this thing lately where you turn on your side, grab both of my cheeks in your dewy hands (from all your drool), and smile the juiciest smile.  You have my freaking heart Riggins Todd Barrett.  You are warm and snuggly all the time.  You let me squeeze you and kiss you and love on you without complaining.  I hope you always let me give you kisses.  Even if it's on your way out the door on your way to school because it would be uncool to give you a kiss in front of your buddies.  I hope you always know how much I love you.  I think I've already written a letter to you about this, but I had a dream about a four-year old little blonde boy when I was pregnant with Reese.  I thought for sure the dream meant that I was having a boy, but then we found out Reese was a girl!  I was shocked.  And then we found out we were pregnant again!  And sure enough...I got my boy.  My little boyfren.

Lately you've been sitting up like a champ, and prefer to be sitting up so you can see what's going on around you.  You love when you can see your sister.  Whenever you guys are sitting in front of each other and interacting, you laugh so hard!  It's hysterical.  Your dad and I can't even get you to laugh that hard!  Some sort of inside joke you've got going on with your sister I guess.  It makes me so happy to see y'all laughing together.  I pray you never forget how important your siblings are to you.  Confide in them and trust them.  Love them and stand up for them.  Guide them and befriend them.  They will be your best friends for life!

You hold such a big piece of my heart little guy.  Thank you for your constant happiness, always reminding me of how good life is.  I love you so much.  So insanely.  So intensely.  So much love your direction Big Rigg. 

Never forget how much I love you and that I will always be proud of you no matter what. 

♥, Momma

Dear Riggs

If these pictures don't show Rigg's personality then I don't know what does.  I probably sound like a broken record saying this over and over again, but he is my angel.  He has reminded me to laugh and soak up life's beautiful moments more.  He is everything I needed at this time of life.  I love my baby girl Reese and hate to keep harping on this, but she really is going through some pre-terrible twos and the tantrums get to me sometimes.  If Riggs wasn't here to keep me smiling, things could get ugly real quick.  Haha.  I love my baby boy.  Just looking at these pictures makes me want to cry happy tears!  

Thank you Riggs for being Momma's saving grace.  For giving me so many reasons to smile.  For smiling 24/7.  You keep us smiling.  You even get your sister to smile when she's upset because she can't have her way, and that is no easy task!  You mean the world to your daddy and I.  Sometimes after a long day when your dad and I are pretty exhausted from our busy lives right now, we might for a second wonder if we accelerated our life's events too quickly.  If we should've waited to have you.  But then it wouldn't have been you, and we wouldn't have you here to snuggle and to keep us smiling.  We couldn't be more grateful for your big presence in our little family.  Like your Grandma Hawl always said to your daddy when he was little...

I love you to the moon and back.

 ♥, Momma

Luke 1:31-33

And, behold, thou shalt conceive in thy womb, and bring forth a son, and shalt call his name JESUS.